#LDRisLife

It goes without saying that I enjoy talking to my boyfriend M. One of the things I love is how we are both willing to ride the tide of our respective imaginations. For example, even though we both agree to seek God's will in our lives and move according to His timing, we do not shy away from discussing possibilities and options which run the gamut from the logical and practical to the absurd and fantastical. However, we always end these discussions with the sobering admission that it's important to submit such thoughts and musings to the God of the Universe whose ways are higher.

Perhaps it's the writer in each of us that fuels these creative exchange of ideas. I, for one, am notorious for letting my mind fly so far out into hyperspace (particularly when we're talking about future plans and travel goals) he'd often need to tug on its wings to bring me back to the here and now. I'd have to admit that in our relationship he's the more responsible (and sensible) one. But this man can out-imagine me any day if he chooses to!

Our conversations are not always of the serious variety or deep and philosophical; but they are always meaningful. We could be talking about the weather, how our days went, something as mundane as how good the tuna melt sandwich from Slices is, movie recommendations, American Idol, Game of Thrones, an old joke that we already laughed about months ago and still find hilarious, or funny observations about random things or people; and yet we end up knowing a little bit of each other with every snippet of information we exchange and strengthen our connection with each one. At least, that's how I feel.

Communication is extremely important in a relationship. But don't think for a second that every waking moment needs to be filled with words. Much of the connection between people is established in non-verbal ways: a touch, a smile, a hug, a kiss, holding hands, sitting quietly in the car on a long drive lost in each other's thoughts, or just standing side-by-side on a quiet boardwalk watching the sunset.

This is why long distance relationships are often more challenging than conventional ones. M and I knew this from the beginning. The good thing is compared to most couples who are only building connections after their relationships have started, M and I already had 16 years of that as friends (12 years of which have been spent 8,731 miles apart). So we are no strangers to the tests distance can pose.

In the course of our long distance friendship, we mostly kept up with each other's lives through social media. We texted sporadically (i.e., once a month or a quarter, depending on the importance or urgency of the situation that needed to be shared) and I don't think we ever spoke on the phone. And yet when we saw each other in person during vacations or the times we traveled together, we always settled into a comfortable and familiar rhythm and just picked up where we left off. 

As our relationship deepened and entered another level, our conversations have taken on different shapes and tones, but the feeling of being comfortable around each other, whether in person, online or on the phone, has not changed. And I think that's because we are not afraid to talk about anything from our dreams, struggles, desires, and even our not-so-kind thoughts. In short, we communicate. 

The miles, the time difference, adult responsibilities, technological glitches (a.k.a. "blackholes" 😉), and physical limitations, notwithstanding, we are handling this LDR life very well (although I think it's a testament of God's sustaining power more than anything). It also helps that we have agreed to always be honest and open and not to impose unrealistic expectations on our relationship and on each other. In M's words, "Less drama, more fun." I like that very much.

#JuAndMiAgainstTheWorld (Photo taken and edited by M)