Crazy Rich

Between Hollywood, fairy tales, and that girl in your class who has hundreds of pairs of sneakers, most of us have been exposed to the idea of opulence; that some people are soaked in it, and those who are not, wished they were.

My parents grew up in poor households; my mother, particularly. She often recounted tales of struggles she experienced as a child. Not with a note of sadness, mind you, nor with a hint of bitterness, but of gratitude for the things God had brought her through. Recently she related how she walked 3 miles every day to and from school on bare feet because she didn't want to wear her sandals out. Since they didn't have money, she needed to make them last as long as possible. She laughingly recalled how fervently she prayed for rain so the ground wouldn't be too hot. As a result my mother developed a respect for money because every cent she had was hard-earned and luxuries such as an expensive pair of shoes did not make sense.

My sisters and I didn't have to endure what my parents did. They saw to it that we lived in comfort and lack for nothing. However, they also made sure that we were able to differentiate between what was necessary and what was superfluous. So when I asked my mother to buy me a pair of Keds, which were huge in my grade school back in the day and I thought they were cute, she gave me a lecture on vanities and how money was meant to be spent for more important things. And my parents' idea of important were different from mine, obviously, such as to invest in a college plan and spend weekends together to bond as a family (e.g., a night at the movies, travel out-of-town to go to the beach, or eat out). And the only shoes they bought us were the practical kind (read: inexpensive but durable and not necessarily cute).

One would think that an upbringing such as the one I had would naturally make me financially responsible and I'd possess a keen sense of discretion when it came to spending. Ha! I wish! I had to learn things the hard way. I used to think that if I can afford it, it's not a luxury. And so, there was a time many years ago, when I was immature and impulsive, I cluelessly indulged in 'the finer things in life' to my detriment. I practically spent most of my salary on tech gadgets (Apple, mostly), designer clothes, shoes, and bags even though I didn't need any of them. The rationale I repeated was, "I can afford it. I earned it. I worked hard for it. I deserve it." And that, my friends, is a dangerous mindset. [Please note that this is not a judgment on those who want to spend their money on such things.] I did not pause to consider whether I was being a good steward of what I was blessed with. I did it because I can. If it were not for God's wisdom, a sense of responsibility, and my parents' loud voices in my head that reminded me not to spend beyond my means, I would've dug a hole that was harder to get out of. 

Money is a tool and a useful one at that. But the Bible cautions that it could easily become something that enslaves us and drives us insane. Where do we draw the line? That's a difficult question that we all must answer if we are to prevent money from becoming our master. Regardless of whether we're regular joes saving every penny for our children's education or the likes of Bezos who has a net worth of 165 billion USD, the following remains to be true: money shouldn't be our god and financial wealth shouldn't be our main motivator. There are more worthwhile things to pursue.

Over the years, I have learned to define luxury this way: if you don't need it, doesn't add value to your life, doesn't benefit or serve others, doesn't build relationships, doesn't enhance your perspective on what's important, does not enrich your understanding of humanity and the world we live in, and doesn't glorify the One to Whom glory is due, then it is an extravagance, is excessive, wasteful, and therefore, a luxury. I know that there are a lot of gray areas in this definition and highly subjective in several cases. But it's a good place to start. Have I always considered my spending through this filter? No. I still splurge on things every now and then such as dinner at a fancy restaurant to celebrate a friend's birthday or a gym membership (one could argue, however, that these are okay based on my definition 😉).

I don't think luxury in itself is good or bad. Perhaps it all comes down to what's in our hearts, our motives, and whether at the end of our lives we could stand before our creator and say we tried our best with everything we are accountable for. So if we have money, we should use it wisely and prayerfully. If we don't, because at certain points in our lives we do go through seasons when we don't have much financial wiggle room, the best we could do is be good stewards of what we do have. Thankfully, the FINEST things in life don't have monetary price tags.

Luxury? No! Ice cream is definitely a necessity. So is cheesecake. And bread. And chocolate. And traveling to different places to taste their ice cream, cheesecake, bread, and chocolate. 🤣